going home!!

i am so excited - i just booked our flights to colorado and houston in june - about 5 weeks from now! the first leg of our trip will be in grand junction, co where my paternal grandparents live and we are having our myers family reunion. it's kind of a bittersweet gathering though... my grandfather was diagnosed with cancer not too long ago and we will be seeing him for what will probably be one of the last times. he is a wonderful man who has been an amazing grandfather - so many laughs over the years! and thankfully, he and my grandmother, through my dad's influence and our many prayers over the years, both accepted Christ a few years ago so we KNOW we will see them again! what a tremendous blessing! :) so we look forward to seeing them next month and soaking up the fellowship with them...

then we will be flying from denver to houston for a little over a week's visit back home!! i already have numerous lunch/dinner plans set up with sweet friends and family members - we are so anxious to see everyone again!!! while God has blessed us graciously with a wonderful circle of friends here in valparaiso, there truly is no place like home :) the comfort of being with someone who has known you since you were a 16 yr. old twerp (or longer!) and still has love for you is priceless!! we are so anxious to hit some of our favorite hot spots (chick-fil-a, saltgrass, los cucos - any REAL tex mex!!) and just chill... i am soooo ready for a vacay! these past few weeks have been long and emotional - God has been stretching me and refining me - but i am grateful for it and a different person because of it! i have grown to love and appreciate my sweet husband (with whom i will celebrate 12 fabulous years of marriage in a week!!) who has been a rock of support for me - and reminded how blessed i am to have my two sweet daughters who keep me on my toes, keep me laughing and keep me praying for patience and sanity :) i can't wait to spend time with them, too!

so if you are reading this and we have not yet made lunch or dinner plans, email me!! jenifer_crane@hotmail.com i love y'all!! :)

the blessings of friendship

i have given much thought over the past few days, weeks, and months to the many friends i have been blessed to make over my 34 years. as most of you know, i moved a lot both throughout my childhood and adult lifetime as well. and all of it, the joys and the awkwardness, has served to mold me into the person that i am today. i have been so thankful to have tools such as facebook and email which have put me back in touch with people that i never thought i'd be able to communicate with again. most of it fun, some of it painful, but all of it GOOD...

i have been able to refresh relationships with people in grade school from iowa. to think that i knew them at the same age that my daughter is right now is pretty mind-boggling! we've all grown and matured, most have our own families and histories, but we are all the same creepy little kids from the early 80s wearing parachute pants, breakdancing, and teasing our bangs :)

i have found some friends from my junior high years, which i spent in 3 different schools in 2 different states... here's a great facebook reunion story :) a friend of mine from 7th grade contacted me via facebook to apologize for something that happened 20 years ago and it had been bothering her all this time... i lived in a teeny-weeny town in southwest minnesota and the whole school met in one building, so junior highers and high schoolers were grouped together in the halls, etc. there was a girl in HS who didn't like me at all because she thought her ex-boyfriend thought i was cute (really, can you blame him?? ha!) one weekend i was going to spend the night at a friend's house so i packed an overnight bag and stored it in my locker - unfortunately, it didn't have a lock on it. i've always kept a journal and had it that day in my bag. she took it out of my locker, MADE COPIES OF IT and passed it around school!!! it was like a scene out of a movie... i was walking to school monday morning and as i approached the school i could see everyone standing around reading something. MY JOURNAL. heads turned, the whispering started, awkwardness beyond belief... and i don't know about you but my journal in junior high was for the sole purpose of voicing frustrations with friends, writing my crush-o'-the-day's name over and over again and griping about parents :) everyone read it and i had a hard time living that one down. i was humiliated and devastated. thankfully i had a few great friends who stood by me (after i had to apologize for writing stuff about them of course!) and they defended me. it was TOUGH. so now, 20 years later, my classmate felt compelled to apologize because she had been there when the girl (who was never confirmed but i have a pretty good idea who it was...) took my journal out of my locker and made it public. she had felt terrible about not saying anything at the time and she's thought about it often over the years. i, of course, told her that her apology was a blessing and to not give it another thought. it was difficult, as an insecure 12 yr. old, to put that behind me but i did, and i believe it is one of the moments that made me who i am today!

in the middle of 8th grade, we moved to tucson, arizona... great move, made some AMAZING friends, many with whom i am still in contact, but that transition was not without difficulty either! i had played the piano since i was 5, basically self-taught, so i loved music. i wanted to be in the choir and so i auditioned for the choir director. well, she loved my voice and asked if i would want to be in the show choir! i was surprised and honored that she would invite me to do that! however, not everyone was. :( unbeknownst to me, it was a very coveted, competitive group and i, by accepting the invitation, had ousted another girl from "her" spot. SO NOT PRETTY. i had made, once again, a few immediate enemies. it almost made me drop out - i didn't want to make someone so mad and i felt terrible. but it was then when i realized i loved to sing, and loved to perform, and had i dropped out to please a few catty girls i may have missed out on one of the greatest blessings in my life...

in 1990, the summer before my junior year in high school, we moved to houston, tx. i started attending a fabulous private school and, through volleyball 2-a-days (argh!) was able to meet some friends before even starting school. however i, once again, found myself on the black list. :( i had tried out for the show choir, made the group, and was placed with a partner based on height (i guess, that's what i figured) he was a senior, one of the captains of the football team, good-looking, fabulous sense of humor, dating a cheerleader and she did NOT like that one bit! the ironic thing was that i was IN LOVE with his best friend and had no interest in him whatsoever (sorry, man!) one day, not long after starting school, i was called out at the start of my spanish class by a girl and went out into the hallway. there was a little "posse" of 4 girls waiting for me... all flanking the cheerleader who did NOT look happy and she handed me a note (FYI, children, before cell phones and blackberries our only form of communication was the NOTE which was written secretly while you were supposed to be doing classwork, folded intricately and passed discreetly, if you were brave enough, IN class, otherwise in the hallway AFTER class...) which read (a brief synopsis) "you are fat and ugly, no one likes you here, why don't you go back to where you came from..." lovely. she then proceeded to call my house, threatening to burn it down, calling me names repeatedly, etc. oh yes, this really happened. :) again, it has taken me YEARS to get to this place but it has taught me so much about forgiveness and putting the past behind me! have we not ALL made stupid, immature decisions over our lifetimes? (holla!!) i would hope that all the dumb things that i have done over the years would be forgiven and forgotten, which is why i offer the same benefit to others...

honestly, as i write and reflect on all this, i have a smile on my face. :) it seems like the basis for a movie (oh yeah, "mean girls" has already been done!) but it truly has shaped me into the woman and friend i am today! i am fiercely loyal and genuinely grateful, every time i make a transition, for a smiling face and a warm welcome!! and although i have forgiven past offenders, it still makes me wary of "stepping on toes" and i cautiously enter situations, especially regarding singing/music, with great sensitivity. and sadly, even as an adult, i have still found people (although fewer and far-between) who have "issues" with me... but i guess that's all part of being human. i would love to be able to please everyone and avoid conflict at all costs but sadly, it just doesn't happen that way all the time :*( however, i am blessed to say, with all confidence and joy, that whenever i have prayed for friends, prayed that God would send just the right person into my life, He has been SO FAITHFUL in doing just that. (shout out to courtney!) i may have had a few along the road of life who have not responded to me favorably but, for every stinker out there, i have made HUNDREDS of amazing, encouraging, fabulous friendships for which i am so very grateful!!!!

so, if you are reading this, i want to THANK YOU for your GIFT of friendship in my life. i am blessed beyond words to have been touched by you in one way or another... God has been so faithful to me, to US, to have given us the ability to fellowship with one another and it is SWEET. and i am GLAD. and I LOVE YOU!!! :)

it never ceases to amaze me...

...that God would see fit to use people of limited means and stature to carry out His ultimate plan in this world. that God would somehow want to involve ME in that plan is mind-boggling... a lot of days i just can't seem to see past my humanness, my corruptible flesh, to fully grasp the big picture. i have always thought (incorrectly, i might add) that there must be something else i need to DO to gain access to God, to positively influence Him enough to find me worthy of blessing... the concepts of unconditional love and unmerited favor are often lost on me. we tend to assign human qualities to the Almighty, Omniscient, Omnipresent God of the Universe - but He is beyond all that! His love for me knows no end and is perfect. Isaiah 30:18-21 says this "Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. (i love that image) For the LORD is a God of justice, blessed are all who wait for him! O people of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more. How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. Although the LORD gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, 'This is the way; walk in it.'" what a beautiful image of God - to think that He "longs to be gracious" to us... He is not sitting, waiting for our next failure with a massive lightning bolt in His hand, ready to strike. He is rising to show us compassion. He is Abba Father. He is a jealous God but I believe right now God is calling me to focus on His great love for me. And for me to fall in love with Him so deeply that every aspect of my life reflects that passionate pursuit.



Psalm 103 is a perfect picture of God's great love for us... verses 8-14 especially...

"The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. He will not always accuse, nor will He harbor His anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust."



so remember with me today, when the enemy tries to whisper in your ear that you are not worthy, that you are undeserving of this great mystery of grace, that God has told you, in His word, that you are unconditionally loved and has promised you His mighty right hand to uphold you and to protect you.



"Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.' The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD." Lamentations 3:22-26



my prayer for all of us today is that God would continue to reveal to each of us, in the deepest, innermost parts of our beings how very much He loves us and how precious we are in His sight. and i pray that it will then inspire us to be the compassionate, unconditionally loving, merciful, grace-giving women, mothers, wives, sisters, daughters that He is calling us to be...

due to popular demand...

i thought i'd post some more pics from our fabulous summers in maine :) since i'm sitting home, snowed in under a good 6 inches of the white stuff, it's nice to reminisce of good times in warmer climes :) so here goes...

i love this picture of the girls and pres. bush - it looks like they're just sitting there chatting with their grandfather :) every other year the bushes host a summer barbecue for the agents and their families at their home in kennebunkport. our first summer in maine, 2005, was by far the most exciting :) when we got to the picnic, agents and their families were chatting and milling around, people were taking turns approaching the president and mrs. bush saying hello, pretty informal setting near their pool outside walker's point, their family home in kennebunkport... when we walked over to greet them, makenna noticed other agents' kids were swimming in the pool. well, guess what? this mom forgot their swimsuits! so, in front of the president, makenna starts FREAKING OUT. (the girls are 5 and 2) i am doing my best to maintain composure as my daughter is going nutso in front of the former president of the united states :) i'm like "it's okay, honey, we'll go swimming later!" in that high, sing-songy, stressed out voice :) well, president bush senses my distress and says "well, i think we may have an extra suit in the pool shed if you want to look" and i said "oh, no sir, thank you, it's okay..." and he insisted we go check it out... so makenna, president bush and i go to the pool shed, a little 10x10 sauna-type room near the pool, and start sifting through the swimsuits hanging in there. now, i know you've probably seen the old dana carvey SNL skits with him portraying president bush and his voice and let me tell you - he's spot on. :) "what about this one?... would this one work?... how about this?..." so so sweet - unfortunately, every suit he held up was a women's size 10 or larger - nothing appropriate for a 5 yr. old twerp :) after about 10 mins., one of the other agents' kids knocked on the door and had an extra suit for makenna - thankfully, david had a better offer for her. he took both girls out on the secret service speedboat, the one that accompanies pres. bush on his ocean excursions, and they were fired up to go for a boat ride. i, personally, was not so i had the opportunity to sit by the pool with the former president and a couple other wives for about 30 mins. just shooting the breeze... we talked about the aggies, the astros, all kinds of fun stuff, and i just remember thinking "this man has sat with world leaders and dignitaries and here he is, sitting with me!" it was surreal, to say the least :) after the girls and david got back we had a few more photo opportunities, a fun tour of their house by mrs. bush and some great food. it was absolutely an afternoon to remember :)

can you see the stress on my face as president bush is inviting makenna, in an effort to assuage her, to sit on the diving board with him?? love it!

i don't know why this pic won't turn but i'm not that computer savvy so it'll have to do - and it's one of my fave shots so i HAD to include it :) this is the president helping the girls (makenna and my friend's daughter, lauren) get some ice cream bars out of the cooler - again, makenna had NO CLUE as to who was standing next to her - she was just thrilled that he was getting her some ice cream :)

i absolutely adore this picture - as i have said before, these two people are thoroughly genuine and wonderful - i cannot express how humbled i am to have been given the chance to meet them and interact with them. there are so many people in this world who disrespect their family and spew hatred towards them but they are loved by so many more, i am convinced of that!! our nation is greater having been led by such amazing men of conviction, courage and integrity. i am sad to see current pres. bush's term coming to an end - have i agreed with him on everything? no. do i think he could have done more? yes. but do i believe, with every ounce of my being, that he always made his decisions based on the foundation of his faith and for the honor and protection of our country!

so forgive my rambling... after watching the commissioning of the George H. W. Bush naval carrier today, an event which david was able to attend with his dad, it has made me nostalgic and so grateful for the chance to witness history from a vantage point that most people don't have - and imagine how many stories david has after spending years with them, on a daily basis! :) lots of fun memories... what a blessing!

Life in the Great White North!

greetings from Valparaiso, IN!! we made it! (barely...) in a nut shell, numerous vehicle problems nearly drove us crazy but we remained confident that God had some big plans for us and satan was doing his best to discourage us from them! we closed on the house on dec. 6th and started moving in on the 9th - we were so thankful for the moving company (the head guy was Bob, about 5'5", 85 lbs. who closely resembled willie nelson, but that sucker could pack a box like no one's business) however i am still up to my neck in boxes and paper!! argh! the house is beginning to feel more like home every day... the girls started school on dec. 11th and absolutely LOVE IT! it's about 1/4 the size of their school in katy (thank GOD!) and the teachers are wonderful - the kids were so excited about the new girls - i told makenna and delaney that in a smaller town it's a much bigger deal to have new kids in your class, not like their old school where kids came and went on a daily basis! they were welcomed with open arms! they've already made a few friends on our street, too, and played outside with them in the snow until their cheeks were bright pink with cold! :) and they have LOVED the snow!!! such an adventure! we have a little creek that runs by our house so they love to go out back and dig around near the creek, in the snow, for hidden treasures :) we had a few warmer days over the past week (upper 50s - balmy!!) and some rain which washed away the majority of our snow but, just this morning, woke up to a gorgeous, steady snowfall which seems to be piling up as we speak! beautiful, fluffy snow - our neighbors probably think i'm a peeping tom cause i stand at the windows and watch it constantly :) oh well. :) i've discovered that i CAN drive in the snow, it's the ICE that poses a problem! as long as we go slow and follow the tracks of the other cars i can get to the grocery store and back without incident :) so far...

we found a new church, too! it's a nazarene church that has amazing worship and the pastor is dynamic and a real people person... we still have questions about the core beliefs of the nazarene church but everything we have read and seen so far totally match up with scripture and we love the message, the people and the kids programs, too! here's the church website if you're interested... http://www.valponaz.org/ i already signed up for a beth moore bible study in january (can't go wrong with beth!!) and the girls are getting involved with their kids program on wednesday nights while mom does choir! the music pastor (worship in arts pastor, as he is called!) is a young guy and super-duper talented!! totally blown away by his enthusiasm and talent and humility in worship! and his wife is precious!! they have two little boys, she works with the childrens worship, and they live near us too - so i think i have made my first official friend! :)

wow, now i really sound like a nerd. it's been tough to be away from friends and family, especially during the Christmas season but we are so blessed by our little family and have thoroughly enjoyed spending time together over the past few weeks! i made my first turkey on Christmas Day and it turned out great! i was sooo proud of myself!! :) some yummy sides rounded out the meal perfectly - good times, good eats! the girls finally got a Wii and we have all been suffering from "Wii shoulder" for the past few days :) it's a tough game! of course, david says that i don't have to get quite so into it for it to work but i'm all or nothing, you know? swinging that tennis racket, swinging the bat, it's serious stuff! ;)

well, it's the last day of 2008 which always causes us (well, me at least!) to look back and reminisce over the past year... our last summer in maine (so sad!), delaney starting kindergarten and being promptly promoted to 1st grade, makenna having a great fall in school becoming her class student council representative (she was so excited!) and, last but certainly not least, the big move to indiana! we are so excited to see what God has in store for this next year and i will do my best to keep you updated :) which reminds me, here's our new address...

890 Dickens Lane, Valparaiso, IN 46383

we love all of you and look forward to sharing the next year with you! hugs!!!

MOVING DAY!!!

it's hard to believe that we have reached the actual date - after much deliberation, schedule shifting, tears and prayer it is here! this is, officially, my last night in this house. our very first house. how proud we were to have built it from the ground up. it was OURS, no one else's. the house where makenna first slept in her big girl bed (and only fell out a few times). the house in which i emerged from our master bathroom, fighting back tears and laughter, trying to decide the best way to tell david he was going to be a daddy again. the house we brought that same, aforementioned bundle of joy home to and made her first bedroom our walk-in closet (not because we didn't have enough room but because mommy didn't want to walk upstairs 10 times a night). lots of birthday parties, 6 christmases, a few tears, even more giggles, nights missing my husband, nights wishing he would go on a trip already, 2 knee surgeries, family gatherings, medical mysteries and missed diagnoses, lots of prayer and LOVE. sweet, sweet memories... all a distinct reminder that as beautiful as our past has been, it is nothing compared to what God has in store for us. i think of all the changes that have taken place over the past 6 1/2 years - some effortless, some painful, all life-altering. the changes in the girls, in me, in US. pretty amazing. to think that 6 years from now i will be 40, my girls 14 and 11 - it seems like an alternate universe :) but i am confident that God is going before us, paving the way, weaving each experience into the other... i am blessed and honored to have had the time here that we've been given - we truly have more than we deserve - thank you for being a part of it. i am excited and anxious to start our newest chapter and already looking forward to coming back to visit :) jeremiah 29:11-13 - my favorite passage from high school, growing even more relevant with each passing day... "'for I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call upon me, and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.'" so often we remember the first part of the verses - focusing more on the outcome than the process - while He wants us to focus on the end result the only way to get there is by calling on Him and seeking Him with all our hearts. fervently, relentlessly, achingly. i pray God gives us that unquenchable thirst for Him, His word, His goodness... may we never be satisfied with mediocrity. never fall into complacency. God bless you my sweet mommy friends - you are a blessing to me!

Further Developments

hey friends, just a quick update :) david and i head up to chicago this weekend for our househunting trip - we have been scouring the real estate sites online and have found quite a few homes which look good. i have been battling mixed emotions the past few weeks - knowing that once we head up there and pick out a house this will all be REAL. right now it's just an idea, a topic of conversation amongst friends and family - but once we head up there, it's reality! i am excited - confident that this move coincides with God's will for our lives but that doesn't mean it's without sadness or sentimentalism... definitely looking forward but, with great nostalgia, reflecting on all the memories and growth that have taken place over the past 18 years i've been in texas... hard to believe - i still feel like that goofy 16 yr. old kid from time to time :) and yet, with a strength and confidence i never had in my early years, excited to step into the great unknown, assured that God has already blazed the trail ahead of us... how awesome is that?

so i will let you know how the hunt is going - pray for david and i to be united in our decision making process - neither of us are too high-maintenance so we're pretty much on the same page so far :) we're excited about the school district up there (brief side note - david will be working in downtown chicago but we will reside in NW indiana...) the elementary schools are fantastic so we are really excited about the girls experiencing schools which are not overcrowded and limited in their capabilities - they've known no different :(

thanks for your friendship and support - you are a blessing to me!!!